Chinese Guy Bitten by Panda, Again

Yet again, someone decided to jump a fence and enter a panda's enclosure here in the PRC, and yet again, said fool has been mauled. This time it wasn't a drunk, and it wasn't a dopey teenager. This time it wan't GuGu, twice-headlining panda in Beijing news stories.


This time, panda YangYang took a bite out of the crime of stupidity, and an uncounted number of bites out of a college student surnamed Liu. (Though a few articles have tried to categorize the twenty-year-old Liu as a "teen," such whitewashing isn't saving anyone any face.) Whatever Liu's major might be, it surely isn't logic, or press relations: asked for explanation (as to just what sort of person thinks jumping into a pen with a bear is a good idea), Liu said, "YangYang was so cute, and I just wanted to cuddle him."


Asked for comment, YangYang informed reporters that the attack should be considered as "a sort of commentary on the failings of a college system whose requirements are simply too lenient." He went on to lament the "apparent inability of some of the nation's top graduates to generalize experiences."


Liu's blunder comes at a particularly embarrassing time for wildlife officials, whose recent ad campaigns--aimed at giving pandas a harder edge--have apparently failed.